Speak the Truth in Love

Amid Paul’s longest sentence found in Ephesians chapter four is the admonition to “Speak the Truth in Love.” It’s a whole lot easier to read this or memorize these words then it is to live it.

I am convinced most people speak what is right to them. It may not be the whole truth, but yes, it is their version of reality. During a conflict, fuel is added to the fire, when a respondent to a statement says, “That’s not true,” or, “That’s a lie from the pit of …”

Expressing truth alone is not enough. Paul said truth must be coupled with love. Truth can kill, or it can bring life.

The determinate factor is how truth is delivered. But it goes beyond that. The way truth is received many times is based upon the perception of its delivery. And, each individual has an opinion that differs from others. Sometimes minutely, sometimes magnificently.

Paul said:

“To the weak became I as weak, that I might gain the weak: I am made all things to all men, that I might by all means save some” (I Corinthians 9:22). Paul was not expecting everyone else to adapt to him; instead, he made an effort to adjust to them.

Paul’s methods changed with each person. Truth is constant, but love adapts. Truth does not change, but the way we present truth must be flexible based on each individual.

Love is not a feeling. Love is action. The good feeling we get comes as a result of an action. Therefore, while speaking the truth we must be mindful of the way we deliver truth.

When it comes to relationships, speaking the truth in love is a prerequisite to resolving conflict. Most couples prefer to avoid conflict because they end up feeling worse, and they don’t like the outcome. If the conflict didn’t start with a fight, it generally ends with one.

Body  Language

When speaking the truth, pay attention to other factors, such as:
• What are your eyes doing? Are they rolling? Are they glaring? Are they hard or soft?
• Are your lips pursed?
• Are your hands balled up in a fist?
• Are you uptight, tense, and ready to pounce?

Not to overdo it, but since I have reference Paul several times, let me do it once more. Paul tells us in I Corinthians 14:32, we are in control of our own spirit.

When in conflict, it is best to portray our truth with a calm spirit. Although doing so is difficult, it is certainly not impossible. Extend some mercy and grace. Look at those you are speaking to through the ‘eyes of Christ.’

Speak the truth in love? Absolutely! But, since you are on a roll, I suggest you don’t stop there. Listen to the truth in love also.

Impossible? Listen to these words as I quote Paul one last time. “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me” (Philippians 4:13).

1 Comment

  1. […] Speak the Truth in Love […]

Leave a Comment





Archives

You might also like these articles...

Recognizing Suicide

I want to talk to you about recognizing  suicide in your world. In 2015, over 44,000 individuals took their own life in the United States. Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in America. Between the ages of 15-34, suicide is the 2nd leading cause of death. In Oregon, one person dies by suicide…

Read More about Recognizing Suicide

Devoted To Destruction

For Christmas 2021, I bought myself 3 Bibles. One of them is an ESV Readers Bible. It has six volumes and has no verse or chapter divisions. I have been reading it this year and am thoroughly enjoying it. In Deuteronomy, Moses gave a history lesson to the people of Israel of their progression from…

Read More about Devoted To Destruction

Is Church Attendance Still Important?

For Christmas last year, my daughter, Amber, got me a gizmo to hold my phone while I am driving. It fits in the air vent. You may have seen one or have one yourself. On the first Sunday morning of this year, I took it out to the car and installed it. Next, I attached…

Read More about Is Church Attendance Still Important?