What About All This Modesty Stuff?

“And it came to pass in an evening tide, that David arose from off his bed, and walked upon the roof of the king’s house: and from the roof he saw a woman washing herself; and the woman was very beautiful to look upon” (2Samuel 11:2).

“Why all the fuss about my clothes – or the lack of them?”

If you have noticed (and I’m sure you have), men and women are not the same. We certainly do not look alike. We do not think alike, we do not value the same things and we do not react alike. If you do not know all this by now–you certainly will learn it after you are married.

“So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them” (Genesis 1:27). It was a “God thing,” not a “man thing.” God did not create “Adam and Steve,” He made Adam and Eve. Adam did not need a duplicate, he needed someone to complement and complete him.

We now live in a “unisex” world. The feminist movement has impacted our culture with the idea that we are all alike; but the more scientists have studied humankind – the more the evidence that male and female are very different: physically, mentally, emotionally, and sexually.

As Christians we need to celebrate and glory in our unique sexuality. Many Christians have given in to this world’s trend and dress in clothes that are not distinctive. In most nations of the world, one can identify which restroom to use by the symbol on the door – dresses on the women, and pants on the men. God’s Word is very plain on male and female uniqueness – by the style of hair: short hair on males and long hair on females (I Corinthians 11).

There is another issue that needs to be addressed. Men and women are stimulated sexually, differently. Men are sexually simulated primarily through the eye gate. This is why we advise young ladies to wear modest apparel. If the dress is too revealing or is too tight it will attract the eyes of all the men around her. Our society knows this and uses this “weakness” in men to sell all kinds of merchandise. Have you noticed the magazines at the checkouts? All of those nearly nude pictures are not by chance. Girls, do not be the cause of a man’s lust. Men can also draw attention to their bodies by overly tight pants, or pants that are suggestive, by allowing them to droop down.

In our scripture text, we find King David, who should have been at war with his army, walking on his roof-top in the evening. He looks over the wall and sees Bathsheba undressed and bathing herself. What God made beautiful to attract her husband, produced lust in the heart of another man. David’s lust led to adultery, which then led to murder. This sin became the pivotal point of his life. This sin influenced and reproduced itself in his family and defined the rest of his reign.

Bathsheba, very likely, was innocent, yet the story illustrates the power of a woman’s body upon a man. Young ladies, keep your body as a gift for your “special” life companion. Sex, within marriage, is beautiful. “Let marriage be held in honor–esteemed worthy, precious, of a great price and especially dear–in all things, And thus the marriage bed is to be kept without dishonor; for God will judge and punish the unchaste and adulterous” (Hebrews 13:4, Amplified).

Young men also need to understand that girls are stimulated sexually through romance and soft touch. Christian young men must limit areas of touch and the amount of touching, including deep kissing, until marriage. Holding hands and showing affection is natural, for those engaged to be married.

“I made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maid?” (Job 31:1).

“I will behave myself wisely in a perfect way. O when wilt thou come unto me? I will walk within my house with a perfect heart. I will set no wicked thing before mine eyes: I hate the work of them that turn aside; it shall not cleave to me” (Psalm 101:2, 3).

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